Friday, October 13, 2017

Life Vs Basketball: How basketball went from being a distraction to my happiness.


When I was real young, playing basketball was purely something I did for fun, without any real aspirations to play it at a high level. Now that I look back, I can see that basketball has been a basis for some of my life’s greatest moments, but also some of my lowest. What I have managed to learn from all the years is something that helps me constantly move forward.

It wasn’t until my teenager years did I realize I could perhaps go somewhere with it. I remember one day getting a Jacob Holmes 36ers jersey from my parents, and one day I got him to sign it. I remember my Mum telling me something that I completely brushed off at the time.

“One day that’ll be you signing a kids jersey,” she said.

When I left to go to college in America, I left at one of the worst possible times. I left just a month after my Mum had been diagnosed with bowel cancer. I didn’t want to go, but she made me. I had to try to compete at one of the highest levels of basketball for my age, while being thousands of miles away from a battling family. It wasn’t easy.

For my first four years of college, I used basketball as a distraction. It was a chance for me to escape the harsh reality that I was facing in my life. The moment I stepped onto the court, for training or games, I had two or three hours where all I could focus on was the game itself. It was soothing. I needed that distraction. For in reality, my spare time in college was always spent between calling my family, checking in with Mum on how she was feeling, how her treatments were going and praying for a miracle.

The first year was arguably the toughest. Thankfully, my family was flying over to see me play in my first home game of my college career. But it wasn’t to be. After battling with a sore foot for a few weeks, while my family was mid flight from Australia to USA, an MRI revealed a fracture in my foot that was to sideline me for the entire year. I was shattered. It wasn’t until they landed 13 hours later were I able to tell them the bad news. I was in a bad headspace. I had lost my distraction.

Thankfully, I got to spend two weeks with my family and my Mum showed me how I could get through the year. She said if she could battle cancer and keep smiling then I could get through my first year of college. It wasn’t easy, but I managed.

Two years on, and throughout many ups and downs with her treatments, basketball had become the perfect means of clearing my head, and it helped. It wasn’t as though I was truly enjoying the game – rather I was enjoying being able to focus on something positive for a change. An empty happiness. Things were going well for me, until I got that one phone call I had been dreading for four years. I’ll never forget the words from my Dad that left my world crushed and body shaking.

“I will never tell you to leave, but I think you have to come home, Pete.”

Two weeks after I had returned home, after spending some of memorable moments with my Mum, the inevitable hit and she passed away. Four years of battling it, many highs and lows for my whole family had come to an end in the worst possible way. However, I had to go back as it was my last promise to her. To finish off what I started. I’m forever thankful to my family for flying me back and being with me as I transitioned back into a life of basketball. There were many times during my few games back when I was ready to throw it all away. There was no distraction anymore, only reality. For four years of college basketball, after every game, no matter what time it was, the first message on my phone after the game was from my Mum. Now never again. Little did I know, she had one message left to send. An assist on a championship buzzer beater from the top of the key…

That moment, compiled with the opportunity to be the commencement speaker at my undergraduate ceremony one behalf of the class of 2015 and being awarded the inspiration award for Coaches vs Cancer, helped me realise the true value of life within my story, and gave me the chance to help others in similar positions to myself. That is something that really makes me happy. 

After college, I had aspirations of playing basketball at the highest level I possibly could, because it’s something I had spoken about with my Mum for many years. I had goals, and I still do. But I had never had a chance to play basketball for fun and to truly enjoy myself until now.

From college I went to England, and unfortunately ended up in a bad situation that had me close to quitting altogether. Again I was thousands of miles away from home, and at a breaking point ready to give it all away. I just wanted to find something to make me happy. I was being treated horribly and I hated every moment I had with basketball. I was down and out for the second time in two years. I had to leave. So I went home, with the hope that being back with family would help me smile again.

Thankfully I was offered a chance with Ballarat to play once again, close to home. I remember walking into the stadium the first day and meeting the assistant coach. He asked me what I had hoped to get out of my season, and I simply said, “I want to love basketball again.” And he simply responded “You will.” Then he asked me what is my next goal after that and I said that if I could love playing again, I want to make the NBL. I want to play here and be close to my family. And all he said was “I’ll get you there.”

I never truly thought I would be able to break into the NBL. There are only so many opportunities, but I never stopped working towards it. For the many times my agent called me and asked if he should start looking at teams overseas, I kept shutting it down. I wanted the NBL and nothing else. No matter how slim the odds looked, I just kept working for it.

Now here I am…

For the first time in as long as I can remember, basketball is a source of happiness. Playing with Melbourne is a dream come true. Being surrounded by not only good people but good teammates too. I’m thankful for that. It’s not always easy, nor do things always go well for me, but I am thankful for where I am. Recently, I flew with the team to America to fulfill a dream of playing on an NBA court against an NBA team. What an incredible experience. However, the day before the game, I came down awkwardly in training and all hurt my ankle. I was down, but unlike the past, I wasn’t out. If it wasn’t for the experiences I have had, I may have really struggled through that. To sit on the sideline and watch my team go toe-to-toe with the world’s best, it wasn’t easy, but I kept looking forward. Seeing how far I had come and how much I have ahead of me. I’m grateful for where I am right now, and I am truly happy every day because of it.

In the past three years, I have experienced some of the greatest moments in my life and also the ultimate worst… But last week I endured one of the most emotional ones.

My first career NBL game, at home in Adelaide, in front of my family and friends. The game had finished, and I got to see and hug everyone, and it truly felt special. This was a moment I had dreamed of, but there was one person missing. As I turned to head back to the locker room, it happened. A kid and his Mum stopped me and asked me to sign his jersey…

That hit me. After I gave him back the pen, I looked up and closed my eyes and simply smiled. That memory came flooding back to me.

“One day that’ll be you signing a kids jersey.”

She had one last message to send…

It’s those memories that I have forever, and it is now basketball, which has opened so many doors for me and given me a chance to truly be happy. Through everything I am able to truly appreciate the value of life, but also am able to understand how lucky I am. I’m unbelievably thankful for where I am and excited for the future. I don’t have to use it as a distraction anymore, rather use these feelings to remember that I am making my Mum proud, one game at a time.

And that’s the biggest win of all for me.


My Pursuit of Happiness

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